You, Him, Her and Them

BLENDEDI just wanted to commend the mothers of my nieces and nephew. My brother has two children by one woman and one child by another woman and can I say that they have mastered this BLENDED FAMILY THING. These women are both under the age of 35 and the level of maturity that they both exhibit is worthy to be praised. They respect one another. They aren’t disrespectful towards one another and they work as a team for the greater good of their children, whom are sisters and brothers.

My oldest niece and nephew’s mom owns a day care center, which my youngest niece attends that has a different mother. Yes! I did say what you think that I said. My oldest niece and nephew’s mother owns a day care center and my other niece that has a different mother attends it. One day I picked my baby niece up from school. She is three years old and her teacher, which is my other niece’s mom says “Study your words and no television.” So when I took my niece home to her mother she says to her “Ms. Daya, said “Study my words and no television” and her mother’s response was “Well that’s just what we are going to do.”

After hearing and witnessing so much petty, baby mama drama amongst women I am just impressed by these two women and I see that the BLENDED FAMILY doesn’t have to be full of BABY MAMA DRAMA, if all parties maintain their boundaries and if both women are mature and are happy within themselves, because we all know that misery loves company.  It is also imperative that the woman that is no longer in a relationship with their child’s father doesn’t have false expectations of being back with him, if he is in a relationship with another woman. Fully accepting the fact that he has moved on with his life will allow her to move on with her life without harboring any bitter feelings towards him and makes parenting easier for the both of them. My brother is still with my youngest niece’s mom and they ALL get along well, which makes it peaceful for the entire family. I am happy for my brother, because this is one less battle for him.

Hopefully, more women will grow up in this area and exhibit this type of maturity, because a BLENDED FAMILY can be full of LOVE, JOY & PEACE if U, HIM and HER worked as a team for THEM.

By:  Phaedra T. Anderson

© 2013 by Phaedra T. Anderson. All rights reserved

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  • Phaedra J
    January 28, 2013 at 12:11 pm

    This is an amazingly beautiful article; hopefully it can reach someone and touch them to move beyond drama to a peaceful awakening! Of course, we don’t live in a perfect world and everyone can’t adapt to this way of living, but the children deserve it. Our children deserve it!!

    • Phaedra Anderson
      January 28, 2013 at 1:25 pm

      Hi Phaedra,
      I thank you, so much for joining us at BRONZE MAGAZINE & I surely appreciate you lending me your time for a few seconds and for leaving a comment. It pleases me to know that you enjoyed reading the article and I thank you, greatly for that and you are so right, we don’t live in a perfect world and everyone won’t get it, but it is my prayer that this article will begin to “TURN ON THE LIGHTS” in some folks, so that they can “TURN OFF” the darkness in the lives of their families that DIVISION brings about.

      UNITY and MATURITY can and will make this thing work for those that have BLENDED FAMILIES, but they have to want it and the desire to work towards PEACE for the greater good of the children has to be there.. Children go through enough and they shouldn’t have to be placed in the middle of parental wars when another party decided to move on. It’s 2013 and hopefully after reading this someone will make the decision to do a way with BABY MAMA DRAMA .

  • Meee
    January 29, 2013 at 8:44 am

    Great article, Phae! I just happen to know your brother & he is a special person(must run in the family.) I wish it could be that easy for a lot of us other men, but it is not. I went through all the petty stuff from my daughter’s mother & I only have one kid. Things were so bad it made me not want to have another child, because I couldn’t imagine having two kids moms like her. It has been hard, but my struggle is almost over. She will be eighteen in June. So keep all the other families in Prayer.

    • Phaedra
      January 29, 2013 at 9:55 am

      Thank you, so much for reading my article and for visiting us here at Bronze Magazine. I know that it has been hard for a lot of men and I am so sorry about your experience, but I do hope that it doesn’t stop you from being fruitful and from multiplying, within a loving relationship, because every experience isn’t the same and you would be depriving yourself of an awesome experience. It is also my prayer that this article will bring awareness to a lot of women and that it would launch a new mindset for those that are a part of blended families. Be blessed and thank GOD that your struggle is almost over!


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