The Pros and Cons of Being Single

By  Dr. Shanessa Fenner

Being single is a choice and an individual has the fundamental right to do so. I reached out to both married and single men and women to give their input on the pros and cons of being single and their responses were quite enlightening.


Your money is your money– You can spend, buy, and do whatever you want with your money. You don’t have to get approval or a confirmation code on how to spend your money.

You can come and go as you please– You can leave the house and come back three days later if you would like. You don’t have to check in with anyone.

You can date many people– You can date as many people as you would like and have some fun and


You don’t have to put up with visits from in-laws and other relatives- You wanted to rest this weekend and here comes 10 in-laws and relatives that are staying for 2 nights.

You don’t have to compromise– You can eat where you want to eat, watch the movies you want to watch, buy the furniture you want to buy, and not have to do what the other person wants to do and when they want to do it.

You are not stuck with one person all of the time which leads to boredom and depression- Sometimes when you are with someone for a long time things can become complacent, boring, and humdrum.

You don’t have to cook– You are expected to cook when you are married. When you are single, every restaurant in town knows you and your order. Your kitchen is spotless.

There is no one to get on your nerves and argue with- You can’t argue with someone when you are single.  

You don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations or fit into their mold-Everybody wants you to be who they want you to be. You don’t have to fit into their world and acclimate to their lifestyle.

You can do amazing things and not feel guilty about leaving your family behind while you are doing them– You can work on college degrees, write books, stay late at work, and do all kinds of things without feeling the guilt of not spending time with your family.

You don’t have to listen to someone snore all night– You can have a good night’s rest without interruptions.

You have independence and a peace of mind– You have the freedom to do what you want to do and the peace of mind knowing that you can without permission or input from anyone.


Everyone tries to hook you up with someone-When you are single everyone wants to introduce you to someone.

Venereal diseases- Nowadays, we have diseases that you take to the grave with you. It is important to protect yourself at all times. Your body is your temple.

Meeting crazy and psychotic people– Yes, you may eventually meet someone who’s missing the fries in their value meal. You meet them today and next week they have moved in a place right down the street from you. They are jealous and want to control you.

Meeting people that tell lies and play games- You meet people that tell lies and play all kinds of games. Nowadays people don’t want a soulmate, they want a helpmate. They are trying to find someone to take care of them.

Sometimes you get lonely– There are times you may get lonely and wish for a significant other.

You don’t have a built-in date- When you are married you always have a date. That is if the person will go with you to events.  I have had many married people tell me their spouse does not want to go out.

There is one thing I am certain of and that is you make the decision on how to live your life.

Just remember, when you give someone 10 years of your life and you were not happy during that time, you cannot get those 10 years back. Do what makes you happy and that is all that matters!





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