BOUNDARIES: Stick to the Script

By contributor Phaedra Anderson


Boundary:  any line or thing marking a limit;
bound; border
We set boundaries in our lives as defense mechanisms; to protect ourselves from unwanted people and situations, but how many of us draw these lines, which represent our beliefs, standards, morals, values and so forth only to find that we allow people to continuously cross them, go against them, insult them and violate them? We allow others to step way beyond their boundaries and overstay their welcome. Far too often, we compromise, conform to the needs of others, become people pleasers and slowly, but surely we begin to lose ourselves, along with everything that we stood for in the process. Things that we vowed that we would never stand for, never do, start to become apart of our everyday lives, but at some point we must draw the line, stick to the script and say “This is what I will and will not tolerate.”

When a director is directing a movie and an actor / actress is having problems with the script and is experiencing difficulty playing the role of that specific character, the director doesn’t change the script to please the actor / actress, but instead he replaces the actor / actress with one that is more fitting for the part; for he knows that if he were to change the script the movie would be altered and the outcome would be different from what the writer intended.

You are the WRITER, the DIRECTOR and the STAR of the movie “YOUR LIFE” and you get to select your ALL-STAR CAST. You decide which characters have leading roles and which characters are supporting actors. You decide what characters get to stay and which characters die off. Don’t let anyone cross their boundaries and alter your movie.


By:  Phaedra Anderson

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  • Anonymous
    April 12, 2011 at 3:15 pm

    A road block is set up to repair the road (brokeness) …. Sometimes its a short time sometimes it takes longer than you expect… but when the relationship I mean road is fixed you get a smooth ride. Bottom line is don't just give up on the road because of a detour check back every once in awhile to see is road is fixed. Remember the road is blocked for repair so the ride can be smoother….

  • Phaedra
    April 12, 2011 at 9:34 pm

    Hi Anonymous! Thank you so much for your comment and I totally agree with you that some boundaries are temporary, until things get worked out, as in DETOURS, but other boundaries are permanent as in a DEAD END and it's so important that we are wise enough to know, which is which, but I love your analogy.


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