by Angie G.
“The more room you give yourself to express your true thoughts and feelings, the more room there is for your wisdom to emerge.” -Marianne Williamson
It’s time for a real conversation. We like to think that we have real conversations. We discuss what we perceive to be the realities of love, economics, and politics. We argue the benefits of voting for President Obama as opposed to Mitt Romney; we talk about the “Basketball Wives” and the “Real Wives…..” (you choose the city); and we weigh in on the whys and the hows of it all. We are just full of opinions and topics. But yet, in the midst of all this talking, we seem to be missing something. We are missing the truth. We can be real, but not about those things that really matter to us. When it comes to expressing our authentic thoughts and feelings, we often choose to remain silent. We don’t have the real conversations.
It is the real conversations that allow us to teach as well as to learn. It is through the expression of our personal truths that we are able to gain wisdom and insights from life’s many lessons; and to inspire others along their own journey. But, it is our fear of judgment that causes many of us to shut down and avoid sharing those parts of ourselves that might ultimately lead us, and others, to fully experience life.
Many of us choose to remain on the fringes of our truth; revealing bits and pieces of ourselves, engaging in shallow conversations, and looking for small signs of acceptance or understanding before venturing forward into the uncertain waters of authenticity. We are afraid of our vulnerability, so we stick with the stuff that allows us to perpetuate the story that is; that it’s all good for us and that we somehow have it all figured out. But what about the challenges that force us beyond our comfort zones? The scary and sometimes painful stuff that causes us to grow? The stuff we might have known had other women in our lives been more willing to open their whole hearts to us? Why is it not okay to talk about that? So many of us are in hiding, even from ourselves, and we carefully construct a reality for others that attempts to explain, justify or pretty up who we really are.
When we choose to withhold the truth about the bad marriage that we experienced, we make it harder for the next woman to seek her own happiness beyond the boundaries of a toxic or stifling relationship. When we pretend that we are happy with our career choice, even when we find ourselves suffocating under the weight of the dissatisfaction that comes along with playing it safe and following the rules, we make it harder for the next young woman to pursue her true passion and realize her own dreams.
So, what do we really allow ourselves and others to know about us? Could it be that us focusing our attention on everything on the outside is our way of avoiding the truth about what’s inside? And what could we learn if we allowed ourselves to play full-out, expressing our authentic thoughts and feelings? We might just learn that true power and wisdom comes from our ability to truthfully express who we are.