Just Keeping It Real With Angela Harris- Relationship Discussion
The short answer is a resounding “YES!” The reality of life for the single woman who desires a husband/companion, is that she becomes aware of all the lovers during this time, unfortunately to a heightened degree. Flowers come into the office, romantic cards are received, and wonderful candlelit dinners are prepared with love and anticipation. It seems that more hand holding is taking place and more kisses are being exchanged, yet the single woman has no kisses, no candlelit dinners, and no hand holding. So what’s up with that? When Lord, when?! The question isn’t when. The question is what do I do with myself during this waiting time? Answer – enjoy the life you currently have by realizing your time of singleness is the time for you to ensure that you are emotionally ready for a relationship. Your singleness is a time for purging and getting over all the hurt inflicted on you and possibly the hurt you inflicted onto others. If you’ve inflicted pain onto others this is the time to first, forgive yourself; secondly, it’s a time to seek forgiveness from others. It’s a time to revisit mistakes and the steps you’ve put into place to ensure that you don’t repeat them. It’s a time to get your house in order so when that husband comes your way, he finds a good thing in you. Value this time of singleness, it is the greatest introspective time you will ever have with yourself. You get to put your wife resume together. You get to package yourself as one who is more of an asset than a liability. You get to identify what type of man deserves your time, energy and companionship. By setting standards you prevent yourself from making the same mistakes made in the past. Remember the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. An extreme truth to remember is that God promises no good thing, nor does He withhold from those who walk uprightly. He promises if you delight in Him, He will give you the desires of your heart.
In order to go through this time gracefully and thankfully it is important to treasure in your heart that God is preparing two hearts for His perfect timing. Your heart is being prepared so when the man after God’s own heart walks into your life you will be ready for him and vice versa. God will not present you to your lifelong soul mate until He has softened your rough edges and He will not present your husband to you until He has prepared his heart.
During this time of wait – here are some tips to making your Valentine’s Day a day to remember:
- Get together with other single women and celebrate each other’s time of pruning and purification. Go out to dinner or to the movies. Celebrate your preparation time.
- Send one of your single friends some flowers and candy with true love sentiments congratulating them on their phenomenal time of singleness, expressing the fruitfulness of that time and the importance of it. Bottom line – encourage each other. THERE IS NO SHAME IN BEING SINGLE!
- Pamper yourself. Light candles in your home and play some songs that lift you up. Fix a wonderful meal for yourself and toast you!! Because you deserve to be toasted!!
- Have a sleep over with your girlfriends. Make it a makeover night or a cooking night. Enjoy each other’s company.
- If you like candy and flowers treat yourself. Love yourself enough to find satisfaction in your ability to acknowledge yourself and to honor yourself.
- If you really desire a husband, write a Valentine’s card to your future husband and date it. This will show him, when he is presented to you, how faithful you were during your waiting process and the wonderful sentiments you felt about him by faith.
Please remember being single is not a curse, it is a blessing. So here’s a toast to my single ladies, enjoy your Valentine’s day. You are fearfully and wonderfully made; my soul knows that very well! How marvelous are God’s workmanship when I look at each of you! I celebrate you with love, respect & honor.